You don't have to be positive all the time

Now I've always been a really positive person, and even being diagnosed with the most aggressive kind of cancer at 40 didn't dampen my spirits. However, when you've had your head down the toilet for several hours, you've lost your hair and you can't even count the side effects of the chemo on two hands, feeling positive is that last thing you want to do. My advice is, if you want to feel sorry for yourself, then do it! People will be absolutely lovely, give you thoughtful presents, best wishes, prayers and support. But, they do find it easier when you're smiling and brave. When you're having a down day, they really find it difficult to know what to say, and 'stay positive' can hard to hear. But don't feel that you have to be upbeat all the time. Cancer is tough, emotionally and physically, and you need to feel what you want to feel - whether it's good or bad. You will have down days. It's pretty unavoidable. But you will also have days when you feel overwhelmed by love and support and you'll bounce back to feeling positive again. Just be kind to yourself. Give yourself time and space to feel what you need to feel. Take a walk. Read your cards or messages from your friends and family. Watch some mindless TV or read a book. You WILL feel better. It will pass.

Amanda