Friday 30 December 2016

A reality check

Some of you may have heard me mention a friend called Kate. I met Kate on the chemo ward three years ago and she is one of the most resilient people I know. She has been enduring crippling cancer treatment for as long as I’ve known her, and this is giving her an extension of life, but ironically at significant cost to her health and well-being. It makes tough reading, but whilst we’re looking forward to a healthy and happy new year it’s important to remember those who are suffering. Here is her story:

“I am not good at doing things like this. But here goes…

I first got diagnosed in 2008 with Grade 3 breast cancer, [cancer has three grades according to how aggressive it is, Grade 3 is the most aggressive]. As a result, I had to have a mastectomy on the 5th December 2008. During the surgery I had to have all my lymph nodes removed as they were cancerous. I had radiotherapy and chemotherapy in 2009 and was taking Tamoxifen for five years.

When it came to five years I had surgery on my spine on my neck. I’d had problems with my arm and was sent for X-rays in March 2014. The surgeons were operating at the base of my head and saw a tumour. They then proceeded to scan all my head and found four more tumours. They were surprised that I wasn't having any symptoms! But I didn't have any. The day after, I went for another scan on my chest and found I had cancer on my lungs. I had three weeks of radiotherapy on my head, which was horrible. I used fall over a lot and couldn't talk properly. Then it was chemotherapy, which I am still on.

The last few months have been rubbish. With having chemo so often the Cancer Centre is like my second home. I've got another two brain tumours now. That makes seven I've got in total. Plus, I've got a tumour on my spine which affects my ability to walk and to turn in bed.

I've got constant pain in my head, arm and hips. I've been having mini strokes; my face starts with pins and needles then half of my neck goes numb and I have trouble swallowing. It then goes into my arm and it starts shaking with pain. Then it goes to my legs and I can't walk. After the last one on Christmas day, my head feels as if it's in a vice. I've been going dizzy, and the left side of my face is numb and hurts. I saw the oncologist yesterday who told me that if I came off treatment then that would be it, as the tumours will grow rapidly. All in all my head’s killing me, I am struggling with the pain, at the moment all I’m doing is crying as I’m struggling to do much.“

Kate

Throughout all of this, Kate carries on. She is several months past the terminal diagnosis she received and keeps on keeping on. If you have moment drop her a message of support on my Facebook page and if you can, say a little prayer that her suffering will ease.

Amanda





Monday 26 December 2016

A big thank you to...

...all my friends, family, colleagues and clients who have guided me through this challenging year.

To those who pretended that my cheeks weren't larger than those of a chubby bunny...
To those who reminisced with me when I thought my time on earth was drawing to a close...
To those who were shocked by my complete appearance transformation...
...and ignored it completely...
To those who prayed ceaselessly for a miracle...
...and made one happen!
To those who cried at my terrible news...
To those who cried at my amazing news...
To those who showered me with gifts...
To those who sent cards and letters when I could barely move from the sofa...
To those who support me even though they don't know me...
To those who read this blog and help me feel like I have accomplished something...
To those who sent me goodwill messages on Facebook and kept my spirits up...
To those who helped me create beautiful memories...
To those who pretended that everything was OK...
...and then went home and cried...
To those who helped me to feel better about myself (Sarah at EgoTrip)
To those whose faith was so strong that death was not an option (that's you Dad)...
To all of you who walked with me when the going got really tough...
To Jayne and Kate, Carol, Jackie and Sue who are still suffering...
To my fellow blogger, Debbie for her support and friendship...
To my incredible friends who have cared for me and made me smile...
To those we have loved so much and are facing the loss of so keenly, in particular, mine and Dean's dear Mums...
To those I don't know but share the ordeal of cancer with across the world...
To those who love me and would change places with me in a heartbeat (that's you again Dad)...
To my spectacular husband for going way beyond the call of duty to take care of me...
To God who literally carried me through the tough times...

Two small words but heart-felt ones. Thank you.


Me on a particularly bad bloating day

Wednesday 7 December 2016

Miracles DO happen

At the time of writing, it has now been three days since I passed my 'best case scenario' death date. It's unspeakably wonderful and I feel giddily thankful for the grace of God in giving me this miracle. I just wanted to say a huge thank you to all of you for your love, your myriad kindnesses, and above all, your prayers. They change the world and they have certainly changed mine. For now though, I will celebrate the best thing that's ever happened to me by enjoying the simple pleasures of a walk on the beach with my wonderful husband. It doesn't get better than that.



Honestly, they really do happen!